Paper was invented in China sometime in the Han Dynasty. Naturally, the Chinese have had a lot of time to play with the medium and this is what they have to show for:

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Paper Mao-rio haha

A few other countries forged their own versions of papercutting: Japanese Kirie, Indian Sanjhi, German Scherenschnitte, Polish Wycinanki, Mexican Papel Picado, American Grandma Old Folks’ Home Art Corner… more of the same…

Then this guy appeared: PETER CALLESEN
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Little nimble Asian hands won’t put you in the lead anymore!


The only DeLorean I’ve seen is the one parked outside the Back to the Future ride at Universal Studios… sunwashed gray, dirty and neglected… hopefully its new owner, the pudgy man in this picture, who won some “out-a-time” sweepstakes back when the attraction closed in Sept 07, will get back in touch with the Doc to get the flux capacitor reinstalled.

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We all know the time traveling bit is fictional, so what’s the big deal anyway? The production of the DeLorean was relinquished back in 82 after being on the market for one short year. Now they are hyping up the comeback, due later this year. The cars will be assembled by hand at a snail pace of 1 or 2 per month with prices jacked up to $58K per unit.

I say ditch the wait list and get your DeLorean now with the following DIY solutions:
Paper DeLorean:
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Or if you want a car you can actually fit in, then mod your own vehicle with Lambo door hinges!
DoucheMobile:
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My favorite toy for the longest time was this Polly Pocket pencil case which folded out into Polly’s dream home. It got confiscated when I swallowed a Polly but no fear… I found the adult version : A shipping container transformer coined the Push Button House by architect/artist Adam Kalkin.

This is one of many “upcycling” and “prefab” architectural designs spawned from the green movement. Prefabrication promotes greener construction technologies and generates less waste compared to traditional land developments. Just take a look at these trailer park beauties:

miniHome
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M-house
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I’m absolutely in love with this Loftcube. Plop mine oceanside and tell me when i can move in.
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I’m still waiting for the kind of future the Jetsons promised. Where is my flying car? The Segway might have fulfilled some of your technological fantasies but the only thing it did for me was bring me closer to GOB. Here’s the latest attempt from Toyota: iReal – a glorified wheelchair disguised under the catchphrase “mobility concept”. The Segway for people whose legs have atrophied (I’m sorry) or people who are too lazy to stand (I’m really sorry).
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Modeling the iReal. I-wReeal to school!

The iReal boasts a maximum speed of 18.6mph which is 6.1mph faster than the Segway! That’s not incentive enough for me to spend a couple grand for either. I’m waiting for these:

  • iBed – mobility while sleeping… oh, maybe call it iLayDown
  • iCouch – make it a loveseat for carpooling
  • iBike – a personal mobility device shaped like a bike except no pedaling required
  • iTreadmill – why waste time at the gym when you can exercise while you’re going somewhere 5 times as fast.

now for one of my favorite videos of all time:


I was on the MTR in Hong Kong and overheard a woman from mainland china talking to her friend about her new CHANNEL bag and her experiences lining up outside the louiSS futt-on store. I giggled a little and generally felt bad for the lady as her plans to impress her friend and fellow subway takers backfired due to her mispronunciations.

I came across this site www.brandspeaking.com which might be of some use to namedroppers like her. I spent some time listening to the soundbytes and decided people who pronounced foreign words “too well” actually annoyed me more than people who mispronounced them entirely.

Take French teacher Prudie who annoyed all the other Austen book club members by frequently doing this at meetings:

HAHA I just made you watch a clip from Jane Austen Book Club!!!! You’re now officially a SAP! In my defense, I saw it on the plane. Now I’m going to do something worse! Quote from the Jane Austen Book Club movie!

Allegra: If only she’d stop speaking French.
Jocelyn: Or at least go to France, where it would be less noticeable!

If correct pronunciation avec accent from a legit source can be nails on a chalkboard when done out of context, then stuff like this should most certainly be punishable by law.

Not funny kid.


“no ironed”

07Jan08

I accompanied a friend to the dry cleaners today and her wool coat got denied because they “don’t do dog pee stains”.  The feeling of rejection resulted in a pact to boycott all dry cleaners. A life without dry cleaning is easy for someone like me to sign on.  I learned early on from other lazy folks that “dry clean only” tags meant cold water, delicate cycle, drip dry. And with that same mentality, KONAKA created this “shower clean” suit. Now you can water down your wool suits without feeling like a lazy cheapass.


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Coin banks are a thing of the past. I see babies writing checks and tooth fairies managing transactions on paypal. As money handling technologies keep improving, our money saving abilities have not. Perhaps, Takara Tomy’s Jinsei Ginko is the answer. The money you insert in this “bank of life” directly goes into the wellbeing of your stickfigure. Watch as your private rags-to-riches story unfolds – living solo in a tatami-ed dump to a fulfilling married life with chandeliered dining halls.
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Jinsei Ginko only works with 500 yen (~$5US) coins. It can take up to 200 coins. The first 10 coins go to the price of the gadget and I suppose a few more will go into the batteries, which, come to think of it, are the real breadwinners for your man in the box.

Someone should bring this to America as I know quite a lot of people will benefit from it. I’m not sure saving quarters will improve anyone’s life too drastically (other than feeling refreshed by clean laundry…) so the American version will have to be formatted for bills. This will be a pain as evidenced by increased violence against vending machines.

Better yet, bring it online like SIMS/second life… except you get the money you “invested” back in the end. A “sand box”* MMORPG** in which characters thrive depending on how bulky your online bank account becomes. The game will make money like paypal (a cut off transactions) but provide entertainment like SIMS. So instead of wasting hours of your otherwise ~$30 per hour life playing second life and spending $200 on a virtual outfit, you can do the same thing AND get most of your money back whenever you are willing to “get real” and sacrifice your character’s well being to benefit your own. If you happen to be also using the MMORPG as a dating service, then you can rest assure the real life counterparts will be more up to par to their online avatars…. at least financially speaking.

* sand box = “toy play”, open ended, non linear style game play
** Massively Multiplayer Online Role-Playing Game


Send your complaints to COMCAST for the last few weary blog-less days. backSLASHER is back but feeling jetlagged and nostalgic. A comic from Sui Hak to get 08 rolling.
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Want something fancy schmancy to wear for the countdown but are feeling handicapped by money and time? Get inspired by Ostwald Helgason’s bejewelled toggery and make your own 2D iron-on floss and be your town’s #1 stunna.


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You know that creepy door that opens up to another locked door in connecting hotel rooms? The door that only spies and murderers take advantage of? I propose every one of them be replaced by these ping pong doors. Now instead of waiting for someone to jump in and kill you, you can take the initiative and give a little knock to see if the occupants in the adjacent room would care for a friendly rally.

Designer Tobias Fraenzel stresses on the space saving aspect of his creation but in all honesty, if I was THAT in need of space and wanted to make every inch of my square footage count, I’d invest in a Murphy bed instead.